Auld Lang Syne

Does anyone actually know any of the words to that song besides "Should old acquaintance be forgot?" Well, here they are, in case you're wondering. I will be out of touch for the next few days, because I am headed up to Stowe, Vermont with a bunch of friends for some skiing. By skiing, I mean lounging around in a hot tub sipping cocktails, because if you think I'm actually going to strap non-shoes onto my feet and go careening down the side of a mountain, then you crazy.
Happy New Year, from all of us here at Divine Comedy of Errors (a.k.a me).

Best Touchdown Celebrations

Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson is known for his elaborate touchdown celebrations, including a santa act last week when he pulled autographed jerseys and footballs out of a big stocking and threw them into the crowd during a Christmas Eve loss to the Bills. This blog entry has compiled video clips of other Chad Johnson TD celebrations. My two favorites are the marriage proposal and riverdance. Some people may find his antics obnoxious and over the top, but I think they are lighthearted and fun. It is just a game, after all.

No More Time To Make the Donuts

Rest in peace, Michael Vale, better known as Fred the Baker.

via RT

Uh, that was sort of embarrassing

Me, excitedly, at work, on the phone with my sister: "They're doing safety training for emergency personnel today and all these hot firemen keep walking through the lab!"
Looking up, realizing that a new group of firemen had just walked in and totally heard me: "Uh, I gotta go. Bye."

Buddha Hand

What the hell is this thing? It's a Buddha Hand, also called a Fingered Citron. Buddah and I discovered it in my local grocery store and just had to buy it, because of the name and as well as its potential uses as a comedic prop. We attracted a lot of attention in the checkout line, because nobody had ever seen it before and no one had ever bought one- apparently a few of then had arrived in the latest shipment of produce and they stuck them in the fruit section. Eri and India correctly identified the name after a quick game of charades involving Buddah and his hand. It smells like a lemon and tastes like "nothing", according to our neighbor Peadar who ate the tip off one of the tentacles. Unfortunately, the Buddha Hand got moldy before I could think of anything good to do with it.

Holly Jolly

I had a fabulous Christmas weekend. Friday night, I had a dinner party to welcome Buddah, India, and Eri, the out-of-town guests. The four of us starting things off early by drinking margaritas while we chopped, marinated, and cooked. Three hours later, when the other guests arrived, the food was ready and we were DRUNK. The evening consisted of much merriment and confusion, when the drunken dinner party dispersed in Copley Square. My sister and I went off searching for our cousin, the others all went to a staff party at B. Good, a healthy fast food restaurant co-owned by a friend of ours, a party trolley was involved, but somehow we all ended up at Clery's to do shots for Maria's birthday. Everyone had a good time, especially MJ, who had so much fun that she overslept and missed her flight.
Saturday consisted of frantic present wrapping (where are those elves when you need them?), and a family gathering at my parents' house. We ate lobsters, went to mass, then continued the tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve. Sunday was more presents, family, food, and fun. My Irish neighbor Peadar and two friends came to Christmas dinner and were a big hit with the family, especially the kids' table. I somehow managed to escape most of the cooking and cleaning duties, which I'm sure I will reminded of over the next year when I am assigned far less pleasant duties. We ate a ton, tested out Eri's new karaoke machine, and then ventured to a local bar to experience the wild Framingham nightlife.
Hope you all had a holiday as enjoyable as mine.
Now, back to work, you slackers!

Happy Holidays

Not sure how much I'll be posting over the next few days, but Merry Christmas (and Happy Hanukkah) to all!

Friday Photo

I stole this one off MJ's blog to post it in honor of her birthday tomorrow. Although she is so young here that the outfit can be considered cute and not awkward, that is one fine helmet. And Mini MJ, the color wheel called and it wants red back. Oh, snap.

Happy birthday, Maria!

We knew this photo was coming

Here are some quotes from emails to ESPN's Bill Simmons regarding Damon going to the Yankees.
This one's my favorite:

Remember the SNL skit from the 90's labeled "Steroid Olympics" and that guy tries to dead lift 900lbs and as he jerks up, both arms rip clean off his shoulders and are still attached to the barbell on the floor and blood is spurting out everywhere from his shoulder sockets ... I hope Damon's arm comes flying off while he is trying to make a throw home and his hand and arm are
still attached to the ball as it weekly lands in front of A-Rods foot and then A-Rod vomits and passes out and Joe Torre has to come out and give mouth to mouth to A-Rods bloated purple lips ... That would ease the pain of this trade-- Mark Faselle, Dallas, TX

In the news

First off, I'd like to say that I'm not that upset by Jonny Damon signing with the Yankees. He's replaceable, and both teams need pitching more than anything else. Scott Boras must be the little devil that sits on the shoulder of professional athletes. Now I am left with only one question- how long before the inevitable commercial involving Steinbrenner, Damon, and a haircut comes out?

Looks like the New York transit workers might be returning to work. Hey New Yorkers, how was the strike?

My hometown is in the national news once again. A woman and her baby son were kidnapped at knifepoint from the parking lot of a Wal-Mart right near my parents' house. Luckily, a quick thinking liquor store clerk called 911 after the woman mouthed "Help me" and the name of the motel where the man was holding them prisoner, so they're alive.

The Senate agreed to extend the Patriot Act for six months, which doesn't sound like good news to me, but seems preferable to the alternative sought by the Bush administration, a permanent adoption of the act into law. Regardless, Santa won't be the only one watching us while we're sleeping.

Wardrobe Malfunction

Sometimes I have problems dressing myself. I will attribute it to general spaciness and the fact that I get dressed early in the morning, pre-coffee, and far from alert. About once a month, I'll suddenly realize that the shirt I'm wearing is inside-out, or that my sweater is on backwards. Occasionally, I'll be on the soccer field or on the treadmill at the gym and look down to see that my shorts are on backwards. Usually this discovery is followed by some sort of proclamation, like "hey, my shirt is on backwards!" and then someone says "Oh, I thought it looked funny but I didn't say anything." (My personal policy is to always let someone know if they have something in their teeth, their fly is down, or if they're getting sunburned, and I wish people would do the same for me. Isn't a brief moment of embarrassment preferable to noticing yourself and then having to wonder how many people you spoke to with a giant chive plastered to your front tooth? And if you're the one talking to the Chive Tooth, isn't it easier just to let him or her know and thus remedy the problem than sit there thinking "Chive...chive...chive...I can't stop staring at it....chive...I'm not even listening....chive tooth...I wonder what he ate... should I let him know?" the whole time you're conversing?)
Anyways, on my second trip to the bathroom today, I noticed that my underwear was on inside-out. That's a new one for me.

List #18....Why I am not a yuppie

So, Maria's new boyfriend is from Southie, and apparently he and his friends consider us yuppies because we hail from the suburbs. This greatly amuses us, because yuppies don't:

1. Plastic their windows in the winter
2. Have margaritas and pigs-in-a-blanket for dinner (last night's tasty fare)
3. Ride the bus
4. Wear jeans and sneakers to work
5. Have to get up to change the channel
6. Drink wine from a box
7. Toilet paper the trees in their own backyard

Keep on blogging in the free world

My friend Dan has started up a new blog, One More Dollar. Like me, he is a liberal Irish-American boozehound who enjoys Bob Dylan and All the Pretty Horses, but he is far more clever and articulate, so it should be a good read.

Movie review: Syriana

Last night, Carolina and I saw Syriana, a movie that aims to dissects the oil industry and the political and economic impact it has on both the United States and foreign governments. The formula was similar to Traffic, which tackled the illegal drug trade in the United States, and it's no coincidence- both films were written by Stephen Gaghan. The film follows a large number of characters: a disgruntled CIA agent (George Clooney), a corporate energy analyst (Matt Damon), two Gulf princes with opposite philosophies vying for their nation's throne, a corporate lawyer, two teenage Pakistani migrant workers recruited by a radical Islamic sect, and a lot of big, bad oil executives in the middle of a huge merger. Although the politically charged message that the United States will do anything, including assassinating foreign leaders, to protect its economic interest comes through loud and clear, the plot was way too confusing. The film would have worked if it had decided to focus on two or three of the story lines instead of inundating the audience with characters, but it didn't. There were too many distractions (the alcoholic father storyline, etc.) and plot twists, many of which are never really explained (like, who the hell was that guy who tortured George Clooney's character, and why?). Another problem was that it was hard to keep track of all of the old, rich, white guys with Southern accents; some were oil executives, some were lawyers, and some were politicians. The acting was solid all around, and Matt Damon was surprisingly good, but I felt frustrated watching this movie because the plot was so hard to follow. Afterwards, Carolina said " What's the point of making a movie so complicated that two Ph.D. students can't figure out what the heck is going on?" which pretty much sums it up. So, basically, the movie was confusing and made me feel stupid.

Feels like Friday

Man, all day long it's felt like a Friday, then I suddenly remember it's only Tuesday and it bums me out. Why the confusion? Probably because I went out Sunday and Monday this week, which hasn't happened in years. A lot of people have already left town for the holidays, leaving me free to play my music as loud as I please in the lab. On today's playlist:

• The Best of James Taylor. It is impossible to listen to James Taylor and not feel happy, unless you have a heart of tin.
• White Blood Cells, by the White Stripes. I'm on a big Hotel Yorba kick.
• How it Ends and Una Volta by Devotchka. Maria and I saw them open for The Dresden Dolls' Halloween show, and MJ bought the CDs and burned me copies, because she is nice and I am a cheapskate. They have a few free downloadable songs on their website.

Proof that SNL is still funny sometimes

Watch this clip

Brought to you by Brigita and Freakgirl

Time's Persons of the Year

Time Magazine has named Bono, and Bill and Melinda Gates as the Persons of the Year. Although this will add fuel to the fire of the Bono haters among us, I think it's an excellent choice, especially in regard to the Gates. The Grand Challenges in Public Health, funded by the Gates Foundation, is a remarkable program that funds research in infectious disease, vaccine development, and similar areas with the goal of improving the vast problems in public health that predominate the third world. As someone who may someday end up working on one of these projects, I think the Gates' program is admirable and relevant. Hey, if you've got a bazillion dollars, you might as well do something useful with it. Working to prevent and cure AIDS, malaria, and tuberculosis, three of the leading causes of mortality worldwide, seems like a pretty good place to start.

Weekend Report

After an eventful Friday evening (see previous post), the weekend didn't slow down much. Saturday, I played soccer and then went to a fun Christmas party at a friends' house, where we discovered that a box of white zinfandel is still a classic holiday gift. And portable, too. Yesterday, we had a party for Maria's birthday in the apartment, with quite a good turnout for a Sunday night. I got Maria tickets to Wicked for when it comes to Boston this spring; we both read the book by Gregory Maguire and really liked it. The M is for Maria party featured mojitos, margaritas, and martinis, and several guests who overindulged in the M drinks (myself included) headed out to a Chinese restaurant in Quincy for some late-night karaoke. Our group delivered several masterful performances, but unfortunately the place shut down before MJ and I could do our duet to Afternoon Delight. We did get a chance to perform Joy To The World, and unlike in the past, when men have literally fled the premises at the sound of our voices (the anti-Sirens?), a mysterious man with a voice of gravel sent us over two Bud Lights. My favorite song of the night was a hilarious version of Bohemian Rhapsody sung by MJ's boyfriend Jamie and his friend Jim. You know most people's accents disappear when they sing? I always thought that phenomenon was so strange, like if you hear any of The Beatles speak, they have noticeable British accents, but when they sing, not a trace. Well, apparently our Irish neighbors are the only people on Earth immune to that phenomenon, because they sang Light My Fire with the thickest Irish accents imaginable.

In other news, the '72 Dolphins popped champagne once again. Congratulations to my favorite non-Patriot and teammates for putting the pout back on Peyton Manning's face.

And I'm still sick, but not as bad as I felt last Friday. I look like crap, though: good thing my hairdresser talked me out of the jet black hair, because I'm looking corpse-like enough this morning.

Lastly, am I the only person with absolutely no desire to see the new King Kong movie? It looks terrible. Bring on the gay cowboys.

Be Popular at Work

MSN recently had an article containing four steps on how to become more popular at work. Based on last night's activities, I have a few tips of my own.

1. At the Friday afternoon happy hour, suggest a friendly game of Asshole. Then become President and make everyone drink like crazy.
2. Know of a restaurant that serves tasty food at low prices and can seat a large party without a wait. We went to Pho Pastuer, a Vietnamese restaurant in Chinatown, and it was perfect for a boisterous group of drunk, hungry, and broke scientists. I had a giant bowl of curry chicken noodle soup and a Vietnamese beer for a little over $10.
3. Slip and fall down in front of everyone at a T station, because wearing high heels on an icy day and subsequently wiping out is the new black, and you want everyone to know how trendy you are.
4. Take everyone to a shady bar that serves scorpion bowls, test tube shots, and meat on a stick. Then buy everyone scorpion bowls and test tube shots.
5. Show off your favorite comedy dance move, the one where you unbutton a guy's shirt while you dance with him, on one of your married co-workers.

So, I've officially said adios to the Work Persona, which is actually quite nice, because the facade was becoming too taxing to maintain.

Bad timing

Ugh, I am sick. And very mad about it. After a two month slump in the research arena, things are finally picking up, so I've been working long hours trying to get as much done as possible before the holidays or the experiments stop working, whichever comes first. I didn't call in sick today because I have a series of experiments planned for today and tomorrow and I don't want to get behind. Plus, we're having a happy hour and a lab nerd outing to the Hong Kong (my favorite bar ever), which I have been looking forward to all week long and I helped to organize. But now I just feel awful so I don't think I'll even be able to go. Additionally, I have a soccer game tomorrow night that I can't miss because the team would have to play shorthanded, and I'm hosting MJ's birthday party on Sunday. Why can't I get sick when I have nothing to do and I can lie around in bed watching The Sound of Music, eating chicken noodle soup? Sorry to make this post all pity-party-for-Eileen, but I feel like someone hit me in the sinuses with a 2 by 4 and I'm not happy about it at all.

Why I love the Onion

For stuff like this: That first one? Hilarious.

Friday Photo

Just when I thought that the previous entries could not be topped, I came across this fine specimen of the 1980's, via someone who would probably prefer to remain anonymous *cough Pat cough*. I love the socks and especially love how the kid on the left is posing, but the picture is quite mysterious. Why are they standing on top of the picnic table? What kind of contest were they in? I'm not sure, but apparently you had to be wearing a patriotic half-shirt to be declared a "Winner." And Pat's sister? Um....not even going to go there, but it's probably a good thing she's standing behind him. What is the kid on the right doing? Shaking up a mini bottle of champagne with which to douse the Winner?

List #17...What I want for Christmas (tangible objects)

1. Digital camera (I'm buying this one for myself)
2. Warm, stylish gloves
3. Curtains for my bedroom (or a gift card to a store where I can pick out my own)
4. A broiling pan
5. A copy of Cormac McCarthy's newest novel, No Country For Old Men

Celebrity Awkward Years

Now presenting....Mr. Brittney Spears!

Nice hair, K-Fed.

Courtesy of Freakgirl

Time to sell the donuts

Dunkin' Donuts is now under new ownership, as a result of a $2.43 billion dollar deal. The former owner, a French company named Pernod, sold the donut chain to a group of three private equity firms (whatever those are). Perhaps the new owners will push for the year-round availability of the pumpkin muffin.

Random acts of kindness and bizarre celebrity crushes

Yesterday, I got stranded at the Braintree T stop at the end of the red line. I realized that I didn't have any cash with me, and the only ATM machine in sight was broken. This T stop is fairly isolated, near a highway and a giant parking garage, but that's about it, so I was facing the possibility of either having to trudge out in the cold and snow along a dark highway or having to panhandle for T fare. I noticed a little stand selling international phone cards, and I asked the man working there if they took debit cards. He said yes. Hopeful, I asked, "cash back?" Negatory. "But there's an ATM outside," the man said. "It's broken!" I replied, with the wavery-about-to-cry voice. "Are you stuck here?" asked the man. "Yes, my sister dropped me off and I don't have any cash on me and the ATM's broken and I don't know what to do and..." The man interrupted me, gave me the two dollars I needed, and told me just to pay him back next time I passed through. Thank you, stranger!

And now for something completely different....
Last night, after a few beers, some friends and I revealed our secret celebrity crushes. One friend really digs 50 Cent and owns all of his albums, and another has a thing for Tony Blair. Me? Jeff Goldblum.

Santa: Jolly or scary?

Check out these photos of kids scared by Santa, then decide for yourself.

Awkward conversation of the day

Here's the uncomfortable conversation I've already had around eight times today:

Other person: Why are you so dressed up today?
Me: Umm...I'm going to a wake this afternoon.
Other person (feeling like a dumbass): Er, um, I'm sorry.
Me (smiling, trying to help the other person not feel like an ass) : That's okay, thanks. It's for my Great Aunt.

Weekend Report

On Friday, in the midst of a freak blinding snowstorm, my friend Colann came up from Rhode Island and we went to see Bon Jovi at the Garden. Hey, make fun all you want, but the show was mint. The audience was full of intoxicated women going insane for JonBon, and they played all of their big hits from the 80's and beyond, including You Give Love a Bad Name, Blaze of Glory, Wanted Dead or Alive, and of course, Livin' On a Prayer. We sat next to a bleach-blonde mother daughter duo from the cape and drank a zillion beers. It was a great excuse to get together with an old friend who lives close enough that we really should see each other more than once or twice a year, but just far away enough that we don't.
The rest of the weekend included soccer playing and holiday shopping. Next year, remind me to get everything online. I've had enough crowds, parking lots, lines, and angry customers for one lifetime. Somehow during my soccer game, I managed to crack my big toenail in half, and it hurts and keeps bleeding all over my sock, so that is adding to my shopping discomfort.

Pride and Prejudice

I saw Pride and Prejudice last week, and I liked it. I assume that most of you are familiar with the classic Jane Austen novel about five sisters looking for love in Georgian England, so I will spare you the details. Of course, this film can't be compared to the 1995 miniseries version, because Colin Firth is the Best Darcy Ever, but it wasn't bad. I liked Keira Knightley as Lizzie, and the actors playing Jane and Mr. Bingley were perfect. It was fun to see Donald Sutherland as Mr. Bennet as well. Those of you who are fans of the novel and of the miniseries version may be disappointed, because this version lacks a lot of the subtlety is a bit more Pride and Prejudice for Dumbasses, as my RT calls it in her more critical review. The film has two different endings; UK audiences saw a chuckling Mr. Bennet, and US audiences were subjected to a much cheesier Lizzie and Darcy love-fest (but no sex, alas) at the end. Despite the movie's flaws, I still thoroughly enjoyed it, I couldn't help myself but to laugh at the embarrassing antics of the Bennet family, root for Lizzie and Jane, and hope that once again, love would conquer all.

Top 30 Mr. T facts

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.
and other facts.

Courtesy of Brigita

Friday Photo: Awkward Family Feud

The Fairs vs.
The Dunnes


Which family is more awkward? Vote in the comments section. The Fair family features lots of bare white legs, but I think Timm leads them with his salmon colored t-shirt and giant white high tops. They're facing some stiff competition by the Dunnes, with Kerry's high wasted pleated and pegged pants, complete with high school letter jacket. I've got the long mullet, while Eri is sporting the mini mullet and some ridiculous pink pants. The most stylish in the photo are my grandparents, despite the fact that my grandmother is wearing a shawl made of plastic. Oh yeah, and what's that in my hand? A metal detector. Yes, folks, a METAL DETECTOR. My dorkiness knows no bounds.

The Forbes Fictional 15

Here's a list of the 15 richest fictional characters. The blurbs are funny; I especially liked the one on Oliver "Daddy" Warbucks (#2).

link courtesy of SixDifferentWays

List #15...Favorite Christmas Carols

1. O Holy Night. Every year, my family goes to mass on Christmas Eve and there's a lady who sings a solo of O Holy Night. I always get so nervous for her before the really high part (oh night, di-VINE) and think to myself "oh no, this will be the year that her voice cracks" but she nails it every time. I love that song, and I like to think that for this one lady, it must be her biggest gig of the year, her time to shine. Every other day of the year she's probably a wallflower, stuck at home doing housework or something, and then, for one special night, she's the star. My sisters joke about my obsession with the O Holy Night lady and claim that I send her threatening letters that say things like "Sing O Holy night or die, bitch!" This claim is entirely untrue, the letters actually say "O Holy Night or I will eat your children."
2. Adeste Fideles. Old school. Latin.
3. Hark the Herald Angels Sing (easy to sing along to)
4. Let It Snow
5. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas. Rowlf the Muppet dog and John Denver do the best verison of this song EVER.

List #16....Least Favorite Chirtmas Carol

1. Carol of the Bells. This song terrifies me. My parents had it on a holiday record and I used to hide under the table every time it came on. The worst part is when it gets really quiet, so you think the song is over and you're safe, then all of the sudden it comes blaring back in full volume. Terrifying, I tell you.

Hump day

Whoever coined the phrase "hump day" for Wednesday was a genius. I'm hungover right now. Ugh. A few years ago, I had a terrible weekday hangover experience, when I didn't want to be late for work, so I dragged my arse out of bed and to the lab, only to end up throwing up in the work bathroom and seeking solace on the cool, soothing tile floor. After that unpleasant experience I vowed to: A. Never get that drunk on a weeknight again and B. If I do have a terrible hangover, it's better to show up to work a couple of hours late and partly recovered than show up on time and do the puking and lying on the bathroom floor thing. Last night, I went to the end of season party for my soccer team with the intention of having a couple of drinks and going home on the early side. However, I had more than a couple of drinks and ended up staying out to 2:30AM, after the Spaniards and I got the bright idea to go dancing on Landsdowne street, only to discover once we got there that there is no dancing to be had on Tuesday nights, so we just drank more instead. I broke vow A but kept B, sleeping in and rolling into the lab at 10:30AM, Gatorade in hand. The good news is that I was the first one in, so nobody even knows I was late! It reminded me of one night when my sisters and Beatriz and I were all still living at my parents' house, and I was out way past my curfew (a category A offense in the Dunne household), and I got home and found Eri sitting at the kitchen table laughing, because she was worried about getting busted for coming home late until she realized that I wasn't home yet, so I'd be the one getting into trouble. Then we realized that Bea wasn't home yet either, so that made us laugh even harder.

Anyways, here's some stuff I would write more about if I wasn't hungover:

• This old lady sure loves hockey hair.
• My dad's in India on a business trip- isn't that cool? I wish I could have gone with him.
• Winter is here at last. Brrrrrrrr.......
• Check out what MJ had to say about my new hair.

Before and after

Football news

Two pieces of good news to report:

1. Notre Dame will be playing Ohio State in the Fiesta Bowl on January 2. Go Irish!
2. Tom Brady was selected as SI's 2005 Sportsman of the Year. Here's the cover:

My new favorite choral symphonic pop band

I recently discovered the The Polyphonic Spree, a band that is more like a choir (complete with robes) than anything else. If you like ELO's song Mr. Blue Sky, than The Polyphonic Spree is for you- a few tracks are available for listening on their website.

Weekend update

I had one of those weekend where I had a lot of stuff going on, overcommitted myself, then ended up ditching out on a few things and feeling guilty about it later. In general, I try never to be one of those "Yeah, I'll come to your party!" people who say yes to everything with no intention of fulfilling those promises, because I hate those schmucks. I mean, if you aren't going to show up, just say so, and that's fine. Insincerity is so unbecoming. This weekend, I was one of those schmucks. I bailed on two holiday parties and one Harry Potter moviethon, mostly due to the birthday party, the soccer game, and the bridal shower that I did go to lasting longer than I had anticipated. Well, lesson learned, in the future, I will be better at saying no to things when I know it is unlikely I will be able to attend, and I'll try not to feel guilty afterwards, because it's pointless. That whole Big Catholic Guilt thing is no joke (and an awesome band name...when I worked a Genzyme we had a long-running debate in the lab over which was worse, Catholic guilt or Jewish guilt. Catholics have the whole nuns and priests instilling guilt thing, whereas no one dishes it out quite like a Jewish mother. The ruling was that until there's a band named Big Jewish Guilt, Catholic guilt wins.) and I know it's silly to feel irrational guilt about things that aren't a big deal, but I can't help myself.

Anyways, here are a couple of observations I made over the weekend:

1. Okay, this is kind of weird, but sometimes when I'm riding the bus, I survey the other passengers and wonder what would happen if we were all trapped on a desert island together. Who would be the leader? Who would have useful skills? Whom would I have a crush on? Saturday, I left the lab and hopped on the #1, sometimes referred to as the T.B. Express (with good reason: exposure to a phlegmy cough with each paid admission!), and looked around. I saw lots of shady characters, including a drunk bum that kept randomly yelling out things like "I'm gonna kick your ass!" and two drag queens (not that all drag queens are shady, but these two were), and I thought "Man, if I get stuck on a desert island with these people, we're all screwed." But hey, you never know, maybe the drag queens would be skilled fishermen and the drunk bum would figure out how to make liquor out of coconuts, providing diversion for the rest of us.

2. Here's the part of this post where I go on a rant about bridal showers. If you're reading this and I attended or helped throw your bridal shower, I don't mean your bridal shower, which was lovely, just bridal showers in general. All I'm saying is that if I ever get married, there's no way I'm having one. They strike me as too much....soooo many gifts make it seem materialistic instead of the joyful celebration of an upcoming marriage. I don't mean to imply that brides who have showers are greedy, because I think most of them do it because it's expected or their family really wants to throw one, but it just isn't for me. The wedding gifts should be enough- how much crap does one couple need? Ugh, and the whole opening up all the gifts in front of everyone? Painful. And the fact that it's mostly kitchen stuff and housey things has a little bit of a creepy preparing-the-bride-for-wifely-duties vibe, despite the fact that I love cooking and would normally love to get kitchen stuff as presents. And the whole each broken ribbon equals one future child? You know what it really equals? Slow-ass unwrapping. Bridal Bingo? How about Bridal Stab My Eyes Out With That Bun Warmer?

Okay, the tirade ends here, because I went to a bridal shower today, and it was great to see the couple and nice of them to invite me, and the food was tasty, and now I'm starting to feel guilty about making fun of bridal showers.

The Carlton Dance

Here's something fun for a Friday...check out The Carlton Dance, one of my two favorite things about the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (my other favorite thing is the theme song). Turns out the dance moves were inspired by a certain actress' appearance in a well-known rock video. I totally want to bust out the Carlton next time I'm on a dance floor.

For another great television dance, check out the horrible boss' dance from The Office (requires Real Player).

Blonde today...

Brunette tomorrow. I have a hair appointment tomorrow and I decided to dye my hair dark brown. This is a big step for me, because I've been wary of hair dyeing ever since I saw what happened to Anne of Green Gables. I'm bored with my hair, the color gets dull and dishwatery in the winter anyways, and whenever I wear my black wig, people (well, just Maria, actually) tell me I should dye my hair dark. I was thinking jet black at first, but my uncle said "like Ashlee Simpson?" and that pretty much ruined it for me, so I'm planning on a dark brown, kind of like the color Drew Barrymore had recently. I'll post the before and after photos. Keep your fingers crossed- I'm still slightly paranoid it will come out horrible and dark green.

Update! I found the perfect hair color, on, believe it or not, Lindsay Lohan!

Friday Photo

Ahhh, the 80's, when hair was big, and young girls dressed like Prince.

World Aids Day

It's today. Here's a link with data about AIDS in the continent most affected by the disease, Africa, where in many countries, over a quarter of the population is infected with HIV.

Red Socks Policy

I work in a laboratory in a research building that is part of a large medical center, and since I don't have much interaction with the hospitaly side of things (other than occasionally taking of shortcut through the hospital and the fact that in every seminar I attend, some M.D.'s beeper goes of incessantly), I tend to overlook the doctor and patient aspect of my surroundings. Yesterday, an announcement was posted describing the new Red Socks Policy. Apparently, patients in danger of falling are now given red socks, so if you see anyone walking alone wearing red socks, you should identify yourself as a medical center employee and either assist them or find a nurse or doctor. I don't know why, but I find this policy humorous. I'm really tempted to wear red socks one day and see if anyone offers to assist me.

Boston sports news

I watched the Celtics play the 76ers last night, and it was a best case scenario for me- the Celtics won, and I got to see my favorite player (and the league's leading scorer, take that, Kobe) A.I., score 40 points. Celtic Kendrick Perkins had the best game of his career: 12 points and 19 rebounds.

The Bruins traded Captain Joey Thornton for three players from the San Jose Sharks. Now that was a dumb idea- the team stinks, they've lost 9 of the past 10 games, and now they're traded away the only player with name recognition and a fan following. Oh, and I think the NHL should eliminate all teams that play in areas devoid of snow and ice in the winter. It just doesn't make sense. No snow, no hockey.

Attention Red Sox fans: if you love Manny and want him to stay, sign this Keep Manny petition.